beautiful things

you guys i honestly think i need professional help.. i’m crying right now for the following...

Thu, 04 Oct 2012 17:21:55 -0500

you guys i honestly think i need professional help..

i’m crying right now for the following reasons

i probably won’t be able to go to the bassnectar concert because mitch and everyone else is staying super late and we have school the next day and my mom is so not cool about things like that
mitch is still going and he is going to get high with who knows who
he isn’t sad about me not going
he retweeted a girl he knows i don’t like saying “I wish things were different.”
HE FUCKING SAYS HE’S HAPPY AND THAT HE’S NOT LYING WHY WOULD HE RETWEET THAT
I DON’T HAVE A TWITTER SO HE THINKS I NEVER LOOKS AT HIS BUT I DO SEVERAL TIMES A DAY
I CAN’T TEXT HIM AND ASK HIM ABOUT IT BECAUSE I ALREADY GOT UPSET TWICE TODAY AND I WOULD JUST BE BOTHERING HIM AND MAKING HIM SICK OF ME LIKE BEFORE
he might be getting sick of me even now but i have no idea if i’m actually making him happy or if he’s lying about it he could be just saying he is just because he doesn’t want to not be with me but he doesn’t want to be with me either
he was super lovey dovey on me all day tuesday but not since then WHY NOT
because he got the thought in his head that me and ryan would get together and he got scared but now that we’re back together he’s sick of me again
i’m tired of being sad for little reasons
he doesn’t remember that i’m depressed and doesn’t really do anything to make sure i’m happy and never asks if i’m okay
i’m afraid to not be okay around him because what if he gets sick of it and breaks up with me
I JUST NEED HIM TO BE FUCKING HAPPY AND NOT TALK TO OTHER GIRLS BUT APPARENTLY THAT IS TOO MUCH TO ASK OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP
i am crazy